During my time teaching in Japan, I have managed to learn a lot about my the English language.
My students here are fond of using and combining letters in ways that would have never crossed my mind as a native speaker. Unfortunately, due to the way English classes function here in Fukui (and likely elsewhere in Japan), the divide between students who excel in English and those who struggle is quite staggering (but that’s a conversation for another time).
The gems of English language I’ve chosen to share today come to us from Japanese middle school students between 12 and 15 years old (Japan middle school equates to US grades 7-9).
I’ve typed out each composition after its photo and provided any necessary context in case you’re confused.
Try your hand at correcting a few if you’re feeling brave (or like being frustrated).

I was the best that I bought glad at all that but beat the partner team by team play that the partner who played a game of the soccer was strong in summer vacation.

I like love stories.
Because I like throbbing.

I am every day is good. Every day is more information is get. More many information is old warld. I am information is for you. I many parson is as TV is as a more many inriting. My house is every day is news paper.

N e w s p a p e r h a s a l o t o f i n f o r m a t i o n. S o, I c a n g e t m a n y t h i n g s.

I pity the girl.
Because she is dead.

Toilet paper
Wiping the buttocks
Useful, perfect paper
The buttocks become clean
Happy

I went to the hospital
I suffer from testicular torsion.
My wounds throbbed all night long.
I couldn’t sleep well.
I had the chills.
I was very tired.
It was my first timetoin the hospital.
I had a hard time.
I had a bad week.

It was parent and me and Mac and Appa and was going to go to Shibamasa on August 23. But it was too slow to select as 23rd and did not have free plan of the parent. A parent bought WiiU for the change that I was not able to go for. And I bought the game software called Splatoon. The game is fun and interesting and is a game of extreme popularity now. But after all I wanted to go out to Shibamasa to play with three friends.

I’m Tira teacher talking to leastening United steatast very good. Because summer bacasone very very long and No, home work.
ぼくはタイラー先生の
はなしを聞いて.
ユナイテッドステータスの
おが. good だと思います。
Because 夏休みか
Bery very longで.
No, homework だからです。

My motto is “common”.
I think that I don’t have to stand out.
Maybe Some of classmates are outstanding player
So I want to be the supporting player.

I was surprised that his father was Mexican-American.
He doesn’t like his father because his friends always sad
to him your American.

I’m proud of us. We are mankind. We are the wisest in organisms. We can understand the world, use the tool. Its name is science. And more than anything, Only we have a heart. we can feel fun, angry, sad, and so on. It’s a miracle. So, I boast that be born as a human being.