Learning To Use The Toilet In Brazil
Reading Time: 2 minutes There is something that all of us do (yes, all of us) that is rarely talked about and has even become taboo in certain circles.
No, I am not talking about listening to Miley Cyrus or even farting and blaming it on the dog; I am talking about number two (yes, that kind).
It has become common practice in many places to use what is known as toilet paper (or “bathroom tissue” – why even pretend?) to purge your sensitive areas of foul-smelling remnants (and dingleberries) post-number two, and to then forever expel said toilet paper to some mysterious place (probably the ocean) by way of a magical button located (hopefully) within distance of your seat (or hole).
What’s the Deal?
Apparently, Brazil is built upon a world of piping so narrow that you’re lucky if your waste even fits through the labyrinth.
Because of this, you are not permitted to flush anything that did not first pass through your body down the toilet. This includes, but is not limited to: toilet paper, tissues, condoms, your dead fish, and vomit (because technically it didn’t pass through).
Many toilets and bathroom stalls have small waste receptacles next to or inside of them – guess what they are for? (For the love of all that is holy (The Grail) do not look inside)!
And be warned, the above is what will happen if you refuse to follow the rules.
